Do I Have To Do This? Is This Homework? Can I Get Extra Credit?

Oh sweet Christ.  I've been tagged for a meme!  I got tagged for one once, by Carrie.  It was only slightly less complex than nuclear fission, so I passed; unfortunately, this one's pretty straightforward, so I guess I should play nice and do it.  Let me just say that when I first started blogging, I would have died to be tagged; I saw that as confirmation that my presence in the blogosphere had been noted and found worthy.  It was the bloggy equivalent of having the cool kids invite you to sit at their lunch table.  However, over time, my natural laziness and curmudgeonly tendencies reasserted themselves and I got to the point where I took a sort of perverse pride that I *hadn't* been tagged much in my blogging life.  Oh well.  Now the only reverse-cool cred I can cling to is my refusal to go to BlogHer.  Having said all this, I am glad my friend Robin tagged me because I like her.  So, with no further ado, I present:

SIX QUIRKY THINGS ABOUT ME

1.  On the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, I used to be an extrovert, but over time I have moved farther and farther into the introvert category, to the point where I now score right up there with those cave-dwelling shrimp who have lived in the dark so long, they're transparent.  I used to be a cheerleader in high school, and now I'm so averse to doing anything that would attract attention, I won't even dress up on Halloween except for the token witch's hat, which I whip off at the earliest opportunity.  I find interacting with people so draining at times, I won't answer the phone unless it's Warren or my parents.  People who know me from school generally don't believe me since I'm fairly outgoing there, but that's because it's a structured environment and I know I can go home at the end of the day and not talk to anyone.

2.  I am quite possibly the most socially awkward person you've ever met.  [Here's proof:  I really, really wanted to end that sentence with, "who's not identified on the Aspberger's scale," and it was only through an extreme act of will that I managed not to.]  I grew up in a family that prized sarcasm and wisecracks.  In college, it took me a long time to realize that these were not valued attributes, and that, as a girl, I was supposed to squeal and jump up and down a lot when I ran into other girls I had just seen fifteen minutes earlier.  Now I make dumb jokes in front of other moms I just met at the playground and, while I often feel horribly embarrassed for the moment, I accept that as the price of doing business with the real world.

3.  Despite the fact that I have a goofy sense of humor, I don't find fart jokes funny.  As my friend Linda says, there are two kinds of people in the world: Those who enjoy fart humor and those who don't.  I'm in the latter group.  I don't even want to hear about farts, except for the phrase, "I'm sorry about that."  The only exception is that I nearly die of cuteness overload when India talks about "toots".

4.  Even though my fashion sense can charitably be called "average," or more realistically "boring," I am attracted to anything pink, glittery, sparkly, or shiny.  I think I'm part crow. If  it didn't look ridiculous for a forty-year-old woman who is not the Queen of England to wear a tiara as part of her everyday wardrobe (with jeans and a sweater, of course), I would.

5.  I am almost completely and thoroughly devoid of common sense.  That, combined with the demise of my short-term memory after my second pregnancy, means that I am a walking hazard to life and limb.  It is only a matter of time before I burn the house down whilst leaving the baby unattended in the bathtub as I walk around holding a knife held blade-outward. 

6. I didn't tie my shoes until I was seven, ride a bike until I was nine, kiss a boy until I was sixteen or drive until I was eighteen.  Yeah, I'm the quintessential late bloomer. 

The Rules:

1. Link to the person who tagged you: Hi, Robin!

2. Mention the rules on your blog. (I just copied them wholesale from Robin's post, because, did I mention I'm lazy?)

3. Tell about 6 unspectacular quirks of yours.

4. Tag 6 bloggers and link them. I tag:  Madge, Nitro Vista, Elaine, Becky, Carrie, and anyone else who needs a blog post idea and wants to do this.  I would tag Anonymous Co-worker, but he probably hates this kind of shiznit and would make horrendous fun of me on his blog, and I'm too proud/insecure/afraid of the power of his rapier wit to do that.

5. Notify taggees by leaving a comment on their blog. AND DON'T ANYONE ELSE THINK ABOUT DOING THIS TO ME, ESPECIALLY THAT ONE ABOUT TURNING TO PAGE WHATEVER IN THE BOOK.  I'm reading a book on toilet training right now; do you really want to go there??? 

Comments

[madge]

Argh! But thanks, I was just marveling at my bloglaziness this morning. Thanks for the push.

[Elaine]

you know I actually like getting tagged because it's a great filler for those days that I have nothing to blog about. So thanks for that one...I'll be utilizing this meme this week for sure. :)

[Madame Queen]

I'm totally with you on #3. Hubs and I have been married for almost 11 years we've never farted in front of each other! "I'm sorry about that" made me laugh out loud!

Also, I'm also with you on #4, though my mom would probably add "anything with cabbage roses on it" to your list. I'm definitely coveting my daughter's pink sparkly princess shoes.

[Auntie Sarah]

"I am quite possibly the most socially awkward person you've ever met. [Here's proof: I really, really wanted to end that sentence with, 'who's not identified on the Aspberger's scale,' and it was only through an extreme act of will that I managed not to.] "

Now, inquiring minds want to know: Are you "the most socially awkward person" in your family?

As a member of said clan, I answer: "NOT EVEN CLOSE! But so what? If we were a bunch of stiffs who think that women aren't funny -- I'm lookin' at you, Christopher Hitchens -- just think how boring our family gatherings would be."